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Use room temperature butter to grease two ramekin dishes. Add the grated Parmesan or breadcrumbs and roll around the dish to cover the sides.
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Preheat oven to 375.
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Melt butter in a small saucepan over medium low heat, add flour, and cook for 3 minutes stirring constantly.
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Whisk in milk.
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Bring to a boil, then simmer a minute or two. Remove from heat.
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Beat in the egg yolk.
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Stir in cheese and a touch of salt. Taste for seasoning. Add cayenne.
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Whip the egg whites with a pinch of salt to stiff peaks.
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Fold 1/3 of whipped egg whites into the flour and butter mixture.
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When not quite mixed, add rest of egg whites and fold a few times until it looks “splotchy white and yellow.”
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Pour into prepared ramekins. Smooth top with a spatula and run finger around rim.
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Bake for 30-35 minutes. Serve immediately.